Comments on: How to overcome relocation depression

By: Tina

Tina — Tue, 11 Apr 2023 04:34:45 +0000

In reply to CC. Peace and Love to you. You most certainly do not deserve this treatment . The mail carrier does NOT deserve a reward for her bad behavior. Every body has bad days. You need to decide if it’s going to break you. Please LEAVE your apartment. Go to a park with birds, flowers,animals and just listen. Sit in the sun for awhile . You are the same worthwhile human you were 15 years ago. You had a patch of bad luck. Get with some people you know care about you, or go to a coffee shop, you are bound to see happy people ther, may be change your perspective. Please believe there is always hope, promise.

By: Beth Huntington

Beth Huntington — Thu, 20 Oct 2022 00:55:41 +0000

Reading these posted stories sounded just like my debacle. We moved from Texas to Florida for my “wonderful” job opportunity. As someone else said above “everything that could go wrong did go wrong”. My husband picked the moving company and I use that term lightly. We were totally scammed. We are missing expensive items, money was stolen and I haven’t recovered from the experience still. Then on the drive down, I had a freak accident at the gas pump as I pulled out the gas nozzle from the gas tank, gas sprayed all over me on my face and clothes. My husband stood there dumbfounded while sweet angels ran over with bottles of water to pour all over me. We moved into the house in Florida, the “movers” showed up at 7:45 pm and hurriedly moved in our furniture. And dumped all the boxes in the garage. None were labeled so we had to open all and hunt for our basic stuff. I am heartbroken about all the missing items. Then we had no air conditioning for 10 days while hurricane Ian roared through, the smoke detectors all started alarming at once and that went on for days until the handyman could come out and replace the batteries. I have not slept a full night since we moved in September. This was more traumatic that my 2 previous divorces. This horrible experience almost led to divorce #3.

I want to go right straight back to Texas and we are (God forbid) going to go through this whole horror again in the next month or two.

By: Marion

Marion — Sun, 19 Jun 2022 07:02:16 +0000

I moved from my lovely quiet village to big city to be full time grandma 16 years ago. The 2 little ones were so sweet (one newborn, the other age 2). I babysat nearly every day & loved it. I went on every field trip, attended every birthday, every dance recital etc for 14 years . i even helped my daughter with her housekeeping chores. My life had such joy & purpose as a fulltime grandma.
Then the kiddies grew up, which is only natural, but I feel like l have no purpose in life anymore, no reason to get out of bed anymore (kind of like empty-nest syndrom) or like i lost my fulltime job.
So i am considering moving back to my old home. Only problem is im worried about moving back all alone, with no family there anymore. I honestly want more peace & quiet & serenity at my age now, 75. the city is fast & busy. My kids & grandkids like the city because of opportunities for work & education. But i am retired, dont drove & feel alone. My old hometown folk are so much more laidback & I know in my heart that fit in better in a small community, as far as a place goes. . Its a walkable village too, amenities all closeknit. No need of a car. I dearly love & adore my kids & grandkids, but i also really want to move back to my old quiet home village.
I havent been able to put roots down here. The city does not feel like home to me.
On the other hand, its not an easy trip to visit back & forth. My old town is rather isolated & requires a ferry to get to & from it. The ferry lineups are long & with 2 or 3 ferry waits .. rather time consuming. Its one of the few cons of living there. Since my daughter & son-inlaw both work fulltime, i do not expect them to visit me more than once a year, but I do hope i can come visit them every christmas. Its a good hour & a half to reach the ferry from my family’s home in the city, but i know they are willing to meet me at the ferry should i visit.
Truth be told, I just need a little advice, regarding whether or not I’m too old to do this move or even to live far away from family. & I dont want to end up regretting the move either. Anyone reading have a similar experience. I’d appreciated hearing your perspective. Thanks!
Sincerely, grandma contemplating move.

By: Deborah Smith

Deborah Smith — Sat, 19 Jun 2021 15:37:06 +0000

It is a relief to read these things, though wouldn’t wish these feelings on anyone! Moved 5 weeks ago on my own, which have done several times before but this move has totally traumatised me – maybe because I’m older now (in my 60’s) but not really sure as always been so independent. The months up until the move were very stressful & in my heart lost the will for it but went through with it partly as certain people had worked so hard for my equity loan. Move day also traumatic & lost stuff. Big reason was to get away from v noisy neighbours & also to move to a quaint cottage but have been shocked by noise from road & other noise I wasn’t expecting, plus cottage so dark in comparison to light I had – truly believed the compromises would be worth it, and I hope they will! but so far have only felt totally overwhelmed & v depressed. I am waiting for secondary glazing & stuff like that, but these factors along with general move stress, everything being online, with all it’s frustrations, and then all my technology breaking down led to me almost feeling suicidal recently. Tech sorting & I am trying to be positive but I never want to feel like this again and I know it’s because I’m on my own – even with good friends I have felt utterly overwhelmed.

By: Amy

Amy — Mon, 13 Jul 2020 21:30:26 +0000

In reply to CC. how are you doing? have you settled a bit better? i moved 13 times (on my own, two cats) since 2009.

By: Chantel

Chantel — Mon, 22 Jun 2020 10:52:54 +0000

In reply to CC.

Wow, this is quite a story, sounds like mine, I lost my job the day before moved into my apartment, I live on the 13th floor (probably a bad omen). I’ve lived in this place for 3 years and haven’t had any financial success since I’ve been here. I hope things got better? Did you decide to stay?
I’m leaving town (maybe a little drastic) because I don’t think I’ll ever have any success in this city. prior to moving here I got into several car accidents. I just don’t think I’m meant to be here.

By: CC

CC — Sun, 03 Nov 2019 02:09:35 +0000

I lived in my last place 10 years alone…and I loved it. I decided to move into an apartment complex for elderly and disabled because the rent was almost half of what I was paying. The 100 unit building is only a few blocks from where I did live, but since I’ve moved everything that could go wrong has gone wrong. Starting with moving day, where my movers and I were “babysat” by the building’s custodians to make sure we didn’t damage anything (apparently a rule). A day later the brake lines went on my car and it cost a pretty penny to fix it. A few days later, as I slept on my couch half naked a maintenance man let himself into my apartment for a “fire alarm inspection” (apparently everyone was notified in advance, but I never got the notice). A week later I accidentally spilled a bucket of mop water in my bathroom and it leaked down into the apartment below me (I cleaned it up quickly, but that garnered another visit from maintenance). When trying to pull out of a parking spot in the lot, I completely drove over a medium, thinking I just hit a curb (it was very upsetting but no damage done). A nosy neighbor knocked on my door unannounced to chat, which I didn’t appreciate very much (I’m a private person). And today, when I went to check my mailbox, the mail woman was currently loading the boxes, and although I was only trying to be as un-intrusive as possible, she harshly scolded me for “sneaking up behind her.” I mean she really let me have it, in front of a couple other tenants that happened to be talking to her. It’s only been one month, and I’m feeling very defeated. I knew I was going to experience moving depression, but I really did come into this new place with a positive attitude and hope that a new place that is more affordable would bring new opportunities for me to self-improve. I just cannot understand why it has been a disaster since day one. Is it the universe trying to tell me I made the wrong decision? Am I just not the type of person who can thrive in this type of housing? I had a little apprehension about moving into a building that is basically a warehouse for the old and in-firmed. but I am quiet and a nice neighbor. I am a bit of a loner, and I like my privacy, but I would never be intentionally rude to anyone (although tell that to the mail carrier….who thought I “snuck up on her.”….in reality I was trying not to get in her way, but my consideration came out the exact opposite in her eyes). I don’t want to be on the bad side of my mail carrier, as I receive and send many packages; so this weekend I’m going to buy a dunkin donuts gift card and leave her a note in the mailbox apologizing for my clumsy behavior. I feel absolutely so terrible about everything. I don’t know what to do….I don’t even want to leave the apartment, even though I feel so stressed being here too. Please any advice or encouragement would be appreciated. Thanks.

By: Sue

Sue — Fri, 11 Oct 2019 14:36:17 +0000

Hi, We just sold our home after being here for 42 years.I raised 3 children and 1 granddaughter who moved out recently. I was in my 20’s when we built this very large house on 5 acres.I am now almost 70. My husband recently retired and decided (I ageed) the house with 5 bedrooms and over 3000 sq. ft was no longer needed,and the expense to keep it also. We are moving 22 hrs away, to a warmer area. It’s heartbreaking for me at this age to leave my family and friends behind. My husband can no longer take the cold weather here. I feel like my life is over.

By: Jim

Jim — Thu, 13 Dec 2018 10:35:39 +0000

Hi all, I’m midway through moving from a central flat we’ve been in for 20 years to a very nice house in the suburbs…Can’t stop crying and having panic attacks and huge regrets. So awful, constantly asking why we did it. Remembering all the local places we used to go just makes me feel sick with nostalgia. But surely it can only get better?

By: Kari

Kari — Tue, 09 Oct 2018 23:01:40 +0000

In reply to Vicki. Hi Vicki, I feel your pain. I’m in the same boat. I left an area that I knew very well where I had friends, both in and out of work. My new city is considerably smaller and I feel like an outsider as a single female. I feel like everyone is in a couple and the wives don’t want me along. So badly want to go back to my old area! Did you end up moving back?

By: haron

haron — Tue, 03 Jul 2018 23:52:28 +0000

hey i just moved, without a spouse nd im freaking out

By: Sara Wise

Sara Wise — Thu, 04 Jan 2018 09:19:14 +0000

In reply to Vicki. Hi Vicki Feeling exactly the same. I don't expect you will get this but if you do how are you now.

By: Vicki

Vicki — Sun, 14 Jun 2015 21:17:02 +0000

Moving without a spouse is the most difficult thing I’ve ever done. I feel overwhelmed and lonely even while at work. Seeing a counselor but wishing I never made the move. How does one make a better situation under those conditions?